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OK, so it's not really that noticeable, but it is there. Generally, it only comes out when I'm tired or if I've been walking a lot. Sometimes you can see it right after I stand up, before I've fully adjusted myself to walking.
It's not some big deal, it doesn't hurt or anything like that. It's just a little oddity I have. Sort of like some people can bend their fingers in funny directions. But there's still a reason why.
Now, I don't know if I was born this way or if it happened during a growth spurt or something, but at some point it was noticed that my legs were not the same length. The difference between them was around half an inch. Not a humongous deal, but something to take note of.
The only real concern was that walking on legs of two different lengths causes the body to align itself on an angle. This can cause spinal curvature. This is a bad thing.
So they needed to X-ray my spinal column to determine whether or not my spine was curving. If it was, they would be able to do something about it as I had not quite finished growing. I believe I was around 10 or 11 at the time.
Having one's spine X-rayed is a bit of a daunting ordeal. You go into a changing room and put on a flimsy piece of paper that covers almost none of your body. Then you're led into what I can only describe as a big room that looks like an empty basement. The doctor comes and puts this gigantic vest over the front of your body that's literally filled with lead, weighing probably 30 lbs or more. Then they stand you in front of this big gray wall and position you. It kind of reminded me of getting my photo taken for middle-school. After that, they all run away into some side room and you're left standing there in the cold, empty room, shivering because you're ass is completely exposed, standing in this awkward position having to hold up this giant metal vest with your neck.
And there's nothing in there to tell you what's going on or when you're done. You just... wait. It's not all that long, but every heart beat feels like an hour in that place. Not one of my favorite childhood memories.
So, anyway, my spine was fine. The difference in my legs wasn't enough to cause lasting damage. Hopefully my legs would even out in a few years. They did, but not fully. But that's not the only reason I have a limp. It's certainly not the reason I can't fully rotate my right ankle.
My mom used to be an elementary school teacher. Her class consisted of first, second, and third-graders. Every year she would take her entire class, and a good portion of their parents on a week-long school field-trip. When I was younger, I almost always went with them.
This year, we were somewhere in Massachusetts, there to hang out at a camp-ground and also go on a whale-watching boat trip. I've been on many whale-watching trips, but only once while having to use crutches.
Around mid-way through the week me and a bunch of the kids, who were all a few years younger than me, were playing at a little playground that was part of the camping area. It was a fairly typical playground, swings, see-saws, sand-box. It also had one fairly interesting thing which I rarely see in playgrounds.
It was an odd little contraption. Similar in many ways to the tea-cup rides you might find at a local fair. It was basically a round section, like the bottom of a cylinder, raised up off the ground on a metal pole. The pole came up and through the top of the round part and had a big metal handlebar on it. The circular part was for sitting and and spun easily around the pole. The idea was that you and some friends could sit in the circular part and grab the steering wheel and spin yourselves around like crazy.
So, a bunch of us got into the little spinning thing. Now, like I said, I was a few years older than everybody else. This spinning thing was really designed for somebody my size. All the other kids fit in just fine, I had... a little bit of trouble.
See, here's the thing: The pole and the steering wheel on top where both made out of solid iron, there wasn't any give to them, they were very, very sturdy. So when I sat down, I noticed that my legs were just a little too long. the top of my knees where about an inch or so taller than the bottom of the steering wheel. So, not really thinking about it, I just sat down and tilted my legs to the side so that they would fit.
Then we started spinning this thing. Since I was a bit bigger than the rest of them I got it going pretty fast. I'm not going to lie, it was pretty fun. For a little while anyway.
Then it happened. At some point, my right knee got a little to close to the steering wheel and it got sucked in. Because we were spinning so fast it pulled my knee completely into the center so that my foot was directly under the steering wheel and my knee was straight above it. It was at this point that my leg made a very noticeable crunching noise and my knee promptly popped out on the other side of the wheel.
Then, I started screaming. I probably scared the shit out of those kids. They got the thing stopped and I crawled my way out and onto the grass, still screaming and trying to catch my breath. It was one of those pains that hurts so bad you momentarily forget how to breathe. It was pretty damn horrible on all accounts.
So, there I am, lying on my back in the middle of a camp playground with all these little kids staring at me, waiting for somebody to come over and tell me what I'm supposed to do about this. Amazingly, my mom show's up. She's probably used to crazy shit like this, having to deal with 30 kids every day, and at a camp ground no less.
So what sage, motherly advice does she give me?
"Stand up and try to put some weight on it" she tells me.
I did. And I nearly threw up on the spot. Eventually one of the dad's there at the campground wrapped my ankle up real tight and we got a pair of crutches from who-knows-where. Then we went on a big ocean-faring boat and saw a bunch of whales.
Never did have that one X-rayed. Go figure.
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